As he tearfully spoke to reporters on the podium about how much the silver medal he had won in freestyle skiing aerials meant to him, you could sense that he was hurting. Ever so strongly. Vancouver 2010, this was it. After two unsucessful attempts at medaling in the Winter Olympics amidst controversy and the infamous drunken antics in Torino back in 2006 which resulted in him being sent home, Speedy Peterson finally won a medal. He had overcame obstacles hurled in his way, a real warrior. "I crossed out 'can', and I wrote 'will'..."

I had the sudden urge to write about Speedy. He might not be a household name to many, especially in where I live, not many people follow winter sports. I am one of the few who follows alpine skiing, freestyle skiing, snowboard cross, halfpipe, moguls etc. Sometime on Monday evening, at sunset in the picturesque surroundings in a canyon not far off from Salt Lake City in Utah, Speedy took his own life, with a gunshot inflicted wound to his head. At a young age of 29. I certainly never saw it coming.

Speedy was the daredevil who invented the hurricane. Five twists and three flips-somersaults while being 50 feet up in the air. He performed that trick with finesse and perfection and thrilled the millions of people watching on tv or in the stands in Whistler. Speedy took extreme sports to a new level. His fighting spirit took him to greater heights, turning setbacks into comebacks countless times. He fought demons, battled the mountains of cannot and will not and doubt. Winning the hearts of many, especially children whom he had become a role model to, on the day when he was presented with keys to the city in Boise, after the Winter Olympics.

He's gone through more than I would ever do so in my life, from sexual abuse to seeing his sister get run over by a drunk driver, his room mate commiting suicide right infront of him, and many more other things that the newspapers have wrote about... suicide and alcoholism. He tried to kill himself but chickened out and lived on. I've felt this way many times before, but the fear of having my heart stop pumping scares me real good. For this I can relate to, based on the abuse I've gone through in life, suicidal tendencies too. Speedy had accomplished a lot at the time of his death. However for me, the question is, how much have I achieved? Nothing. I'm still a college student, with 19 credits shy from graduation. He won an olympic medal and won the hearts of many and had hundreds of people come out to welcome him home. What would people remember me for if I died, say today? Nothing either. Speedy had a huge heart and great charisma. I've got a long way to go on that.

So many obstacles he overcame, but that one mountain he could not overcome, as what the mayor of Idaho said....that led him to that fateful drive to the parking lot in the canyon where he shot himself.

Life is precious. When the going is rough and it feels to you that the world has caved in around you, you gotta hold on. I've felt this way too many times. Still hanging in there. There's so much more to live for.

Though I never met you, could have if I took a chance while in Utah last Christmas, your presence on tv and throughout the web will be missed. Speedy Peterson. I hope you're getting big air up in paradise, and tearing it up the ramps, free from suffering and pain. Signed, a fan.

Can you tell me where to go its killing me and no one knows,
Inside with all this mind, you waste the sunlight waiting for the night
They don't wanna break me down; they don't wanna break away from you
Everything's wrong now, everyone's gone now,
I can't keep lying to myself...
...........
Maybe another dream won't die
They can't be the first and be the last to break away

(Cavo-Disappear)

Link to the post-competition interview, Whistler 2010:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvX7OZIm4FU